Sorry I’m Late I Didn’t Know What To Wear…

Sorry I’m late I just didn’t know what to wear…Vans or heels? Vans or heels?

In the end I opted for the Vans, my favorite pair with skulls and spiders…get your own here, ah shucks you can’t. E-mail me we’ll talk I’ll send you mine. Can you walk in a ten? You’ll have to buy me a replacement, there are several I have my eye on.

When I thought about this topic I was looking for a pair of 3 inch spike heels I had, sort of a faux lizard skin…Via Spagia. I know that sounds tacky but it was the 80’s and those shoes were hot. In them I was a towering six foot one inches tall (most of it legs). I had a figure fitting grey knit dress with a zipper that ran from top to the bottom on the front. It was smoking, I was too literally. Puff, puff, puff.

Now I can’t imagine who that woman was, in the heels and the slick dress…I have not had a dress or skirt on in at least four or five years. The last time I put on a dress it was for a fund raiser at my last employer.

It’s now blissful self employment, tennis shoes and an outfit that includes shorts, tank top and my flip flops. As evident in the photo I have a flip flop tan on my feet when I look down it makes me smile.

And it’s permeated my psyche too…flip, flop, flip, flop, flip, flop. Slacker and lack of ambition or at least ambition of a different sort. I work hard but in a much different way then I did before.

It feels good – like a pair of Vans finally broken in …you do what you want when you want, wear what you want when you feel like it. No more bosses, insults or discrimination.

Who was that woman in the heels? Those past wardrobes are gone donated to someone who needs them more than I do, there are just a few things left…like a pair of patent leather pumps, a full length leather coat, some silk dresses, a silk Ann Klien suit. I’m sure I’ll never wear them again and they will go too, I think about those clothes and how much I paid for them and I hang on just a little longer.

Now I slip on a wide leather belt to hold up my button fly jeans as I slide into a pair of mean black leather boots. And apparently am to cut off my locks and wander (looking at the voting) – out into the world edgy and tough. Yes that is what feels right to me too.

Hmmm all of these different women I have been. It’s so strange how I have played all my life with gender, and roles and where I fit and “wear I fit”. And at each point in in my life it has felt right, it has felt authentic, and yet it has been so different in terms of what I was doing with my wardrobe or my sexuality.

But right now — a dress, heels or even some small amount of makeup just doesn’t fit…I end up feeling like a cross dresser. Strange – what about you? How has your taste in clothing been affected by where you are in your life, with your sexuality?

What comes first the biker boots or sleeping with girls? Or sleeping with girls in biker boots? How has your taste and style evolved…


6 Responses to “Sorry I’m Late I Didn’t Know What To Wear…”

  1. Hahn at Home Says:

    In my 20s and 30s I was SKINNY. Not, not so. Last time I wore a dress was in 1993 at my twins’ adoption. My style is ball cap, shorts, t-shirt – dressier if I have to go to work at the main office – suits, usually matched shoes.

  2. glued blue glass Says:

    I’ve had a pair of biker boots for years and even though I consider myself slightly femme I have never been able to handle heels. I don’t have the balance. Now I prefer wearing clothes that I can hike in no matter what the circumstances. I have a few more dress up walkable clothes for work but I could hit a trail at any moment in nearly of my clothes, including my dresses and skirts.

  3. I dressed very edgy and dark when I lived in NYC. Spandex, leather, ripped t-shirts, big boots with steel toes, all black. I dress more conservative where I live now. I shop in both Women’s and Men’s department. I enjoy playing with gender and appearance.

    I never got into button fly jeans. All those buttons, too much hassle. (grin)

  4. So we’re dressing for style not statement? Or perhaps a little bit of both.

    Chewy I totally relate to the edgy, dark look…for a time I had purple hair and a black and blue attitude. I am often grateful that our generation didn’t do permanent things who knows what I would’ve done if piercing and tattoos were the rage when I was 20.

    And the buttons are called foreplay…

    -janet (still bad to the bone)

  5. I just don’t feel physically comforable in most women’s dress clothes, especially the shoes.

    Used to love button fly jeans, a white T, and Doc Martens when I would go out to play in Boston in my 20’s. Trying to find my style now that I am in my 40’s and supposed to be all grown up.

  6. CJ….we’re supposed to grow up?

    I forgot.


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